A couple months ago I was sitting at the table eating Pad Won Sen... talking to my Witchy Women about our lives, loves and some losses. I was reminded by one of the gifts I used a few years ago to help her clear some heavy stuff... and another told me of an energy exercise I taught her to help her daughter. It hit me like it has about once or twice a year... others reminding me of my gifts. I feel like I just start to climb out of the goo and into my wings... and as quickly as it sparks... just as quickly, I cozy back into the warm sticky goo.
I reached out to my best friend again to see if he would make space for me at his wellness center, TurningLeaf... of course he says yes, of course he is supportive. So I started putting myself out there...posting on social media a little.... offering my services. I listened to my own design... I waited for the invitation... I had some false starts and some times of feeling unable to rise to the occasion. But then just like when her words reached out to me at the Thai table, she reached out, wanting some clearing. I jumped at the chance, I pushed myself to believe, and just go instead of making excuses. As I sat in her warm inviting home, I relaxed and listened... to her words, her heart, my knowing.
I walked away feeling renewed... open... using my gifts in the perfect way for me. While life can seem like a rough ride at times, unable to know who belongs in my life, who will walk out and who will stay. The knowing I have is that I'm here for more than just the grind (even though I've lived my life bruising my spirit grinding) Sometimes I make the wrong steps... sometimes I push against the grain instead of flowing with it... sometimes I say the wrong things... and look for my value in the wrong ways... And today I sit at my friends desk after he has gone, and I write my truest thing. I am opening space by coming to the office on Tuesday nights... by telling the universe that I am here to do my work, live my purpose, share my gifts, shine my light and help others give birth to their best selves. If I have clients I will clear and connect... if some days I don't, I will write to get more clear or I will read and hone my craft. Either way I am here, holding space, ready, open and willing to be an instrument of love and light.
I am here to honor your process and timing. I am here to guide your breathing through the pain, to wipe the sweat of life from your brow, to encourage you, and remind you of the strength you have from deep inside to push through to the other side. I am here with you to help you give birth to your highest self, and remember your own divinity.
We will move through the mess and the bliss together, and find beauty in the journey.
Teri Soul Doula
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